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Akiva Lane
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What fairy tale is about using puns in rap music?

Rap-pun-zel.

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Akiva Lane
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What kind of tails come with a list of specifics?

Details.

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Shane Ronay
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What happens if you ask your builder not to carpet the steps in your house?

He'll give you a blank stair.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the person who smoked too much go to Istanbul on a cold day right after Thanksgiving?

Because he wanted to go cold Turkey.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the thief who wanted to repent always do things very quickly?

He didn't want to hold people up.

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Akiva Lane
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Why is the ocean right now like money?

It's a current sea.

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Shane Ronay
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Are these seagulls?

No, they're stool pigeons.

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Akiva Lane
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How did the vegetarians react when Melinda offered to bring sweet and sour chicken to the party?

They said, keep your two scents out of it.

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Akiva Lane
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What did the large fan say to the girl holding it?

I'm one of your biggest fans.

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Akiva Lane
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What is a policeman called when he's sleeping in bed?

An undercover cop.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Trump remove the restrictions on plastic straws?

Because in terms of government intervention, it was the last straw.

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Akiva Lane
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What US city has 2 male children?

Tuscon, Arizona.

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