Pictures:

When Andy gave Meg the engagement ring, what playing card did Meg feel like?

The Queen of Diamonds.

772

What happened when Sam lost the sheet listing his debits and credits?

He lost his balance.

1587

What do you call skinny chickens?

Paltry poultry.

125

Why did Sir Edmund Hillary climb Mount Everest?

It peaked his interest.

2519

What do you call a President that is also a dentist?

President-ist.

2273

Why did Arlene dislike washing the dishes?

It gave her a sinking feeling.

746

Why was Arnold arguing with his stomach?

Because he ate something that didn't agree with him.

2007

How did Boris feel about losing the kick-boxing championship?

He wanted to kick himself.

785

What is something that we wear that is called by the material that it used to be made from?

Glasses.

2697

Why should you take a sharp pencil seriously?

It has a good point.

1762

What do you call an airline founded by a group of inheritors?

United Heirlines

1459

Yes, it's on the house.

3198