Pictures:

What is this picture saying?

Crime is out of the question.

2836

What song is this about?

Hit the road Jack.

2873

Why did the injured man show no emotion for 6 weeks?

He'd broken both his humerus and sternum.

1067

When Jack felt that his out-house was too dark, how did he feel after he put a large hole on the top of the door to let in light?

I needed that like a hole in the head.

3220

How is a bird similar to the wife of a miser?

They both go 'cheap, cheap'.

1870

What is a noun that makes money?

A pro noun.

1204

What did Fred say to the driver of the car that hit his car from the back?

You're a pain in the rear end.

399

What part of the day does not have an odd amount of Ning?

The Even Ning.

2675

After his cold, why did Phil feel like a pony?

Becauses he was a little hoarse.

941

What is the difference between a child and Shakespeare?

One is involved with play, and the other is involved with plays.

805

The leaning tower of pizza.

1699

What do you do when your electrical system short-circuits?

Re-fuse to make it work.

845