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What law is involved with marriage and family?

The Law of Relativity.

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Why was the teacher arrested for using a compass and a ruler?

They are considered weapons of maths destruction.

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Why did the clown leave the circus?

Because people were always laughing at him.

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What is it called when trumpet players play their trumpets in response to each other?

A toot for a toot.

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What do you call someone who puts together kitchen cabinets?

A counter fitter.

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What do longshoremen and medical secretaries have in common?

The both work at the docs.

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What's another name for the period leading up to the dot com bubble bursting?

The com before the storm.

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When John learned to play a musical instrument with his ear, what was the result?

He could play it by ear.

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Why should we be very cautious about being cynical?

Its first syllable is sin.

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Why is a Phillips-head screwdriver so popular?

People see it as a plus.

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Why did Marty not want to get rid of his old beat-up car?

Because then he would be wreck-less.

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What fruit must get formally married?

Cantaloupe

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