Pictures:

What do you call someone who is an expert about alarm clocks?

An alarmist.

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Why did Debra Smith come up with exactly 1,263 famous idioms?

That's all she wrote.

1791

What did Bob say to the fly that what bothering him?

Don't bug me.

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Why didn't ancient man understand the world of the stars?

It was over his head.

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Why do UN ambassadors stay so healthy?

Diplomatic Immunity

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Why did Bill always make sure he had enough reck with him?

He didn't want to be reckless.

3148

Why was this year's Chili Cook-off cancelled?

Somebody spilled the beans.

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What did Larry name his new ink and toner business?

Ink, Inc.

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What did the hotdog say to his friend the apple?

I want to be frank with you.

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In Amanda's school, why didn't the teachers write errors in the margins of the paper?

Because the paper they used had no margin for errors.

1716

Why was Timmy destined to become a tennis pro?

He raised a racket since he was young.

377

What is another name for a car's complete history?

An autobiography.

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