Pictures:

Yitzchak Berger
General
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

Because it was two tired.

1330
Yitzchak Berger
General
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Why can't you trust atoms?

Because they make up everything.

1704
Yitzchak Berger
General
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What do you call someone who helps on a farm?

A farm assist.

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Yitzchak Berger
General
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Why did the kleptomaniac go to the doctor?

He wanted to know what he could take for his condition.

1654
Yitzchak Berger
General
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Why did Fred stop being an accountant?

He started hearing invoices.

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Yitzchak Berger
General
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Why was the teacher arrested for using a compass and a ruler?

They are considered weapons of maths destruction.

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Yitzchak Berger
General
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Why is bread a lot like the sun?

Because it rises in the yeast, and sets in the waist.

1570
Yitzchak Berger
General
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What does Sudafed mean?

Bringing litigation against a government official.

716
Yitzchak Berger
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What does the word 'avoidable' mean?

It's what a bull fighter tries to do.

715
Yitzchak Berger
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What is a book about all the things that a person thinks they should have done differently?

An oughta-biography.

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Yitzchak Berger
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What do you call a paper airplane that can't fly?

Stationary.

1925
Yitzchak Berger
General
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Why did Betty distrust stairs?

She felt they were always up to something.

1333