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Akiva Lane
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What happened when a truck carrying strawberries got into an accident?

A traffic jam.

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How did Helvetica respond when someone suggested that she go out with Times New Roman?

He's not my type.

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When do you tell people what they are?

When you tell them, 'You are welcome'.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Arlene buy a rug?

She had some problems that she wanted to sweep under it.

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What did Noah do before the flood?

He was pre-pairing.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the therapist keep a bell in his office?

If what he said didn't ring a bell with the patient, he could ring the bell for the patient.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Martha lose weight when she ate vegetables?

Because they took away her appetite.

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Akiva Lane
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When is door not a door?

When it's ajar.

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What is similar between estimates and baseball players?

They both involve ball park figures.

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What is the origin of the word 'stain'?

It's a spot that is stayin' in the clothes.

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Akiva Lane
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What should you take when you feel stressed?

Take a break, and take it easy.

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Why did the mathematician plant an apple tree?

He knew how to multiply, so in addition he wanted to be fruitful.

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