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Akiva Lane
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Why did Martha not appreciate her beautiful kitchen counters?

She took it for granite.

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What happened when the paint Jerry took spilled on his hands?

He was caught red handed.

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Why did Marty not want to get rid of his old beat-up car?

Because then he would be wreck-less.

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Why is it difficult to build submarines?

Whatever you build is sub-standard.

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Why was Sara confused when she learned about animals on a farm?

She couldn't understand how you could fit animals into a pen?

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What postage is similar to a woman giving birth?

Special delivery.

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Why are the Patriot missiles kosher?

Because they have fins and chew their scuds.

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What Beatles song is about a bee in a vegetable garden?

Lettuce bee.

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What is special about the sentence, 'See, yes we can'?

The words mean Yes in Spanish, English, French, and Hebrew.

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What two letters are empty?

MT

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How can we know when someone is ready for dating?

When their dating resume is UP TO DATE!

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What can you say about someone who wanted something for a long time?

The longing was long.

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