Pictures:

How did Bill describe his ability to make great tea?

It's my specialty.

3157

What do you call a collection for money to plant bushes?

A hedge fund.

459

What type of shop specializes in watch components that are accurate up to the minute?

A second-hand store.

707

What part of the meat did Bill try not to bring to his wife from the freezer?

He didn't think it was a good idea to give his wife the cold shoulder.

1964

What is as important as a good watch dog?

A good CAT scan

284

What did Fred say to the driver of the car that hit his car from the back?

You're a pain in the rear end.

399

What do employment recruiters and cannibals have in common?

They're both called head hunters.

2832

How is this person feeling?

He's down in the dumps.

3057

What do you call a doctor who prescribes a daiquiri cocktail flavored with hickory?

A hickory daiquiri doc.

416

Why was the small horse limited to merely walking in a straight line?

It was a one-trick-pony.

270

How did the man who ate nothing but vegetable soup for decades live to be 100?

He took good stock in himself.

372

Which U.S. landmark are people in the biggest hurry to visit?

Mount Rush more.

185