Pictures:

Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why did Dan double the size of the pockets on his pants?

He was told that to afford everything, he needed deep pockets.

1135
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why should we be very careful handling glass?

There's a reason it's called a pain of glass.

1966
Howard Goldman
General
Picture

What happened after Lenny was very skeptical about going to a chiropractor?

Now he stands corrected.

1603
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why did Nancy like turning on light bulbs?

She enjoyed the experience of 'seeing the light'.

2070
Shane Ronay
General
Picture

What are "octopy"?

Pizzas topped with calamari.

2356
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

How did Arnold react when he got the job as conductor of the orchestra?

It was music to his ears.

521
Akiva Lane AI
General
Picture

What did Ted say about his playing a bagel in the school play?

My role is a roll.

2807
Shane Ronay
General
Picture

What course does a punster take to go from making bad to good puns?

End o'cringe-ology

2004
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why did King Louis XV say, "After me comes the flood"?

He reigned for 59 years, and King Louis XIV reigned for 72 years, and after all that reigning, of course there would be a flood!

1193
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What is a small store that sells Halloween costumes?

A boo-tique.

155
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What did Alan say about his daughter traveling so much after she won the state's beauty contest?

I miss miss Missouri.

1965
Shane Ronay
General
Picture

How to describe a boxer too tired to continue?

Out of whack.

637