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What did Max say when the mechanic said he must fix the car brakes?

Those are the breaks.

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Why is there a lack of neurologists?

Few have the nerve.

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Why did a lot of people want to use Alan Richter's bathroom scale?

Because they wanted to know what they weighed on the Richter scale.

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How did Andrea feel when she was running out of her favorite red perfume?

She felt bad that she was down to her last red scent.

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Why did Bill try not to reminisce about his days in the Merchant Marines?

He didn't want to miss the boat.

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Why did Betty need to call the dry cleaner where she had left her clothes?

She had a pressing question.

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Why did Marty become a bartender?

He was so wild as a kid, people said he would end up behind bars.

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Why was Jim happy that after dieting he fit into his old clothes?

He knew that when it comes to dieting, it's survival of the fit-est.

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Which U.S. city do people have the hardest time losing weight?

Gainesville, FL

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What part of the day does not have an odd amount of Ning?

The Even Ning.

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What's the best way to eliminate vapor from your windshield?

I haven't the foggiest idea.

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How did the decorations on the toilet paper feel?

They were on a roll.

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