Pictures:

When did the mother of a newborn boy wake up?

At son rise.

1489

What are batteries called when they no longer work?

Badderies

3182

How did the small piece of wood feel when there was nothing to do?

It was a little board.

51

What does a website have in common with a tightrope walker?

They're both online.

3226

What is a rebellious tick called?

A heretic.

2735

What does a credit card, a cell phone charger, and a bull all have in common?

They all charge.

3250

Why was the ballet teacher considered to be so good?

She really kept her students on their toes.

1516

After Joe was dazed by getting hit in the head with a baseball, what was he looking forward to?

The end of daze.

3309

Which paintings are not on display in museums?

Those with no strings attached.

194

What vegetable do you not want to take onto a boat?

A leek.

524

Do you want an ark for protection from a flood?

I Noah guy who can help.

984

What did Bob have to decide when someone insulted him before he boarded the plane at the airport?

Fight or flight.

2411