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What music do they play in Boulder, Colorado?

Rock music.

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What do you usually don't mind losing?

Weight.

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What do doctors and musicians have in common?

They both use instruments.

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Why did the employee make sure he never signed his name twice?

He was concerned that if he re-signed, he'd be out of a job.

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How did this team win the championship?

They put up their Dukes.

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When Sir Edmund Hillary climbed Mount Everest in 1953, how did he feel?

He felt on top of the world.

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What is a caveman's favorite meal?

A club sandwich.

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What is a punster's favorite vegetable?

Corn (you knew that).

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What do teachers and eyes have in common?

They both have pupils.

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Which is the most proactive garden rodent?

The gofer.

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What is the term for a relapse of influenza?

Deja Flu

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What do you call two monkeys sharing an Amazon account?

Prime mates

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