Pictures:

Why did Bruce breed racing deer?

He wanted to make a fast buck.

1898

Why was the teacher arrested for using a compass and a ruler?

They are considered weapons of maths destruction.

671

What happens when a person sleeps on old magazines?

He has back issues.

595

What happened when Bob re-labled the jars in his wife's spice rack?

He's not in trouble yet, but the thyme is cumin.

1956

What do you call someone who helps on a farm?

A farm assist.

2485

What’s the difference between a hippo and a zippo?

One is really heavy and the other is a little lighter.

853

What happens when you put on a thick sweater and get very hot?

You become the sweater.

1918

Why do French eat snails?

They don't like fast food.

3235

Why didn't Jane play hide and seek?

Good players are hard to find.

1910

What do you call someone who puts together kitchen cabinets?

A counter fitter.

2484

What was Bill's reaction when he got hit in the head with a can of soda?

He felt lucky it was a soft drink.

855

What do you call a row of rabbits hopping backwards?

A receding hare line.

1899