Pictures:

Which doctor would you want overseeing your bacterial infection?

The Chief of Staph

187

Why did the man stop returning to the buffet?

He was fed up.

2560

Why was no one able to buy more summer hats after a man just did?

That was the last straw.

191

How did the honor student ace his Political Science exam?

By being politically correct.

221

What is a good 2-part security method?

Beagles and locks.

2549

Why did the man buy so much bottled water?

There was a liquidation sale.

1026

A picture worth a thousand words.

1269

What did the driver say when she nearly hit a fawn crossing the street?

Oh deer!

268

Why do courthouses attract the most audiophiles?

Because of the "hearings".

1096

Which country is most upset about gas-guzzling automobiles?

Mad at gas car

1103

What did the man say when needing to repair his socks?

Darn!

2545

Why did Debra Smith come up with exactly 1,263 famous idioms?

That's all she wrote.

1791