Pictures:

How did Phil become such an expert at bumper cars?

He took a crash course.

868

Horses are fun to ride...

...but make terrible neigh bors.

1485

Why did the man travel to India for a corned beef sandwich?

He heard they had a new Delhi.

292

What is an orthodontist's main goal?

A sound bite

210

Which type of make-up remover is used by all genders?

Withdrawing an apology

1811

Why are trombone players usually easy going people?

They've learned to let things slide.

827

What happens when a wolf learns about mindfulness?

He becomes aware wolf.

2527

What is the key to "flipping" houses?

Heavy leverage

2386

Is the entire world starting to think exactly the same?

Just the indoctri-nations.

1114

Why is voting "Nay" more direct than voting Aye"?

It's straight from the horse's mouth.

1817

Why do we use the term "rode" once we've ridden?

We've been down that road before.

1094

Which king was this?

Edward IV - he had a short reign.

877