Pictures:

What is this optician doing?

He's seeing eye to eye with his patient.

1793

Why did the woman crash into the building where Mark had just been standing?

Her driving instructor told to hit the mark.

1801

What position is for one working part-time overseeing an orchestra?

A semi-conductor

1210

What do you call a sick lawyer?

ill legal.

1432

It's illegal to laugh loudly in Hawaii.

You must keep it to a low "Ha".

1430

Which king was this?

Edward IV - he had a short reign.

877

How do mountain goats seem to defy gravity on steep slopes?

They use cliffhangers.

1113

What is the proper term for a clash between snakes?

A hissy fit

219

How did Joe afford an expensive water filter system for his home?

At a liquidation sale.

1212

What's going on here?

This man's wife asked him to hold his horses.

875

Why do 95% of bald people still own a comb?

They can't part with it.

2221

What's the best way to eliminate vapor from your windshield?

I haven't the foggiest idea.

1775