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What do you call a duck that is a bad doctor?

A quack.

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Why do violinists put rosin on their violin bows?

It makes the violins rosin-ate.

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What do you call birds who go to a house of worship?

Birds of pray.

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What does the king of England have to do with writing a successful book?

They both involve royalties.

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What do you call an appointment that gets cancelled?

A dis-appointment.

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Why did Billy find it so easy to climb walls?

Because he was so off the wall.

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What does the Constitution have in common with balancing a checkbook?

Checks and balances.

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What is similar between IDIOM and IDIOT

Both have 5 letters, begin with IDI, and are hard to understand.

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What do carbon atoms do before they get married?

Carbon dating.

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Why is laughing out loud forbidden in Hawaii?

It's a low ha state.

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What happened when the truck carrying jelly had an accident?

Traffic jam.

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How did Max feel about pulling his old couch to the junkyard?

It was such a drag.

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