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What is the air-conditioning system in a baseball stadium called?

Baseball fans.

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What does an orchestra and a destructive mob have in common?

They both have violins.

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What is a well after the repairman fixes it?

Well adjusted.

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What did Noah do before the flood?

He was pre-pairing.

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Why didn't Johnny want to wear fringes on his clothes like some of his friends?

He didn't want to be part of a fringe group.

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What was it called when Grace tossed a pea pod to someone she wanted to stop arguing with?

A pod cast to start a peas process.

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When Shakespeare had writer's block, what was his motto?

Where there's a Will, there's a way.

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Why was the baker happy?

Because he had all that he kneaded.

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How does the can opener get its name?

Because it can open things.

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If two eyes are labeled A and B, what eye is smarter?

A Eye

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If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress?

Congress.

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What was Karl Marx and his brother called?

The Marx brothers.

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