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Akiva Lane
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What did the miner say when he found gold?

It's mine!

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Akiva Lane
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Why did King Louis XV say, "After me comes the flood"?

He reigned for 59 years, and King Louis XIV reigned for 72 years, and after all that reigning, of course there would be a flood!

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Akiva Lane
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What is the most disrespectable aspect of the computer?

The cursor.

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Akiva Lane
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When the truck spilled coffee grounds all over Marvin's lawn, what did his lawyer say?

"I think we have grounds for suing the truck company."

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Akiva Lane
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What is a stretched rope that walks around called?

A tight rope walker.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call bees who don't answer you directly?

Cagey bees.

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Akiva Lane
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What did Gil's back say when he returned from a trip?

I'm back.

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Akiva Lane
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What animal does Niagara Falls remind us of?

Buffalo, because that's where Niagara Falls is.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call birds who go to a house of worship?

Birds of pray.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Jeff start rope climbing?

He wanted to learn the ropes.

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Akiva Lane
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What happened to Bill?

He tripped while he was on a trip.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the singer stand on a key?

He didn't want to sing off key.

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