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What didn't Alan understand about the Humpty Dumpty nursery rhyme?

How were the king's horses involved in putting Humpty Dumpty together again?

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Why did the philosopher become a locksmith?

He wanted to find the key to happiness.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call a valley where convicted criminals make silly jokes?

Silly con valley.

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When Alan was arrested, why couldn't he accept invitations?

He was fully booked.

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What do you call blue-berries that are in a container underground?

Buried berries.

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Why is this inspiring?

It says 'Eye can!'

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How did Max feel about having lice?

It made him feel lousy.

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What was Samantha's reaction to the small flea market?

She thought it was a little bizarre.

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What do these have in common: a fish in the ocean, doing things well, and a small apartment?

They all involve efficiency.

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How did Billy feel when he blew out the candles on his birthday cake?

He was delighted.

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Why are bees that are born in May confused?

Because they are maybe's.

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What's the advantage of buying eye glasses with frames colored by Rose Jones?

You can see through Rose-colored glasses.

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