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Akiva Lane
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What is it called when someone had a good date, and tells you about it?

An update.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Linda name her dogs Rolex and Timex?

They were her watch dogs.

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Akiva Lane
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What's worse than a crazy driver?

Someone who drives you crazy.

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Akiva Lane
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How is the political system similar to the pages in a book?

Because everything is either justified right or justified left.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Matt run in the desert?

For the big race, he wanted to make a dry run.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you get when you are in a hurry?

You get going.

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Akiva Lane
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What is built into the walls at Microsoft headquarters?

Microsoft windows.

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Akiva Lane
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What did Sylvia say when her lunch fell down a well by mistake?

Oh, well.

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Akiva Lane
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How are governments sometimes similar to sunglasses?

Both of them can be polarized.

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Akiva Lane
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What kind of car can become a religious convert?

A convertible.

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Akiva Lane
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What being always acts and feels lousy?

The louse.

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Akiva Lane
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What does Shakespeare getting sick have to do with feeling angry at someone?

ILL WILL.

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