Pictures:

Akiva Lane
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What phrase both applies and does not apply to the Titanic?

"Icy" does apply. 'I see" does not apply.

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Akiva Lane
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How do you describe pulling a penny out of the sewer?

The ascent of a cent with a scent.

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Akiva Lane
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What's a good name for a parking garage that treats its customers like royalty?

Par King.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the father bring a broken cup to the family meal?

He wanted to play good-cup bad-cup with his kids.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call worrying about the complications of losing money in a real estate complex?

A complex complex about a complex.

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Akiva Lane
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What is a well after the repairman fixes it?

Well adjusted.

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Akiva Lane
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What did Heaven say to the angel that put too much dew on the grass?

Don't over dew it.

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Akiva Lane
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Why was Fran getting sea-sick using her computer?

Because everything was on her sea drive.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the left foot, when it was in back of a person, feel sad?

Because it felt left behind.

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Akiva Lane
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How did Marty respond when his wife accused him of drinking a fifth of whisky?

He pleaded the fifth.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Bill's tongue always hurt?

Every time he wanted to say something that he shouldn't say, he bit his tongue.

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Akiva Lane
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What does someone say to a friend who he thinks is too optimistic?

You topian!

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