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Akiva Lane
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Why was Bill so exhausted after a day of putting tires on the inner rings of car wheels?

It was tire ring.

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Akiva Lane
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What is confusing about alarms that get activated?

Do alarms go off, or do they go on?

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call relatives who are sleeping?

Nap kins.

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Akiva Lane
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On what kind of day does time seem to go slowest?

On a fast day.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call a perfect egg?

Egg-selent.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Bill start running the 100 yard dash?

He wanted to get his life back on track.

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Akiva Lane
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Why didn't Maxine like using coupons that could be torn out of magazines?

She thought they were a rip-off.

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Why did they hang the criminal?

He was looking for a loophole, and he found one.

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What do geese and cars have in common?

They both honk.

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Why did Liz putting a wedding song as her phone's ring tone?

She wanted a wedding ring.

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Akiva Lane
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What is the scan number on a box of cereal called?

Its cereal number.

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Akiva Lane
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What can you say about an elevator's day?

It has its ups and downs.

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