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Akiva Lane
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What do you call a zoo that feeds the animals zucchinis?

A zoo-kini.

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Akiva Lane
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What kind of tea decreases a person's intelligence?

Stupida tea.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Matt guard his fence?

He didn't want anyone to take offence.

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Akiva Lane
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Why was the hungry secretary like a clock?

At meetings she took minutes, and at meals she took seconds.

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Akiva Lane
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When John proposed to Joan, what playing card did he look like to Joan?

The King of Hearts.

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Akiva Lane
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What do they say about a great baseball player?

That the hits just keep on coming!

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Akiva Lane
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What did Bill say to his inexperienced chiropractor?

Your a real pain in the neck.

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Akiva Lane
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If a person is comfortable in social situations, what does he have?

Social security.

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Akiva Lane
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Can you believe someone who eats steak from a male cow?

No, because he is full of bull.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Joe find it difficult to invest his money?

Because to him it didn't make cents.

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Akiva Lane
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What is the letter O called when it acts strange?

A weirdo.

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How did Arnold react when he got the job as conductor of the orchestra?

It was music to his ears.

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