Pictures:

How did Maxine feel when her stomach started crying because of the way she was eating?

She knew she had an upset stomach.

542

How did the teacher feel when he realized that no one was paying attention to him?

He felt like he was the chairman of the bored.

673

When do parents feel that they aren't parenting enough?

When - in relation to their kids - they feel only 'parenthetical'.

2649

What do palm trees and calendars have in common?

They both have a lot of dates.

2322

How is America similar to those who figured out how to make a bus that looked like a cylinder?

Column bus discovery

2361

What is an imaginary ocean?

A fanta-sea.

695

What do you call a Jewish congregation in Orange County that tries to focus on their prayers?

Concentrated Orange Jews.

346

Why didn't Bill like going to the aquarium?

He thought there was something fishy about the place.

1421

What's the motto of a clothing maker that encourages young men to wear vests?

Go vest, young man, go vest.

550

What is the person who a cougher coughs on called?

Coffee.

944

Why did Betty look for someone who loves ceilings?

She thought it would be cool if she got a ceiling fan.

2363

Why did the employee make sure he never signed his name twice?

He was concerned that if he re-signed, he'd be out of a job.

513