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When Jerry looked at his legs, how did he know that he was eating too much?

His calves had become cows.

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What are flies that hang around a clock called?

Time flies.

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Why was the newborn baby bored?

Because his mother just bore him.

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What flower is named after a part of the head?

Tulips.

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How did Frank's hitch-hiking trip go?

It went without a hitch.

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What is a lawyer's favorite girl's name?

Sue.

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Why did King Louis XV say, "After me comes the flood"?

He reigned for 59 years, and King Louis XIV reigned for 72 years, and after all that reigning, of course there would be a flood!

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Why did Milton Berle say he is going to stop turning around?

Because every time he turns around, another year goes by.

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How did the mouse respond when the cat invited him to play?

What's the catch?

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What is an insect that hums?

Humbug.

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What do you call someone who has a very active radio show?

Radio-active.

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How did the pitcher learn to throw curve balls?

It was a learning curve.

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